Couples counseling can help you craft the relationship you want.

Choosing the right couples counselor is hard.

I’m Dr. Joy Heafner. I love helping people create fulfilling relationships.

I’m Dr. Joy Heafner. I love helping people create fulfilling relationships.

It’s understandable why most couples are nervous about couples counseling.

You might worry that a couples counselor will take your partner’s side, and you’ll feel ganged up on.

You might be afraid the counselor will tell you that you should leave your partner. Or they’ll try to convince you to stick it out, no matter how you feel. 

Or maybe, you’ve been to counseling before and the sessions just made things worse. You’re afraid to stir the pot, or of getting a therapist who doesn’t know what they’re doing.

All of these fears are real.

You may have spent months or even years wondering if a couples counselor can really help you. Then, when you finally make the decision to go for it, finding someone you click with is an entirely new problem. It’s a lot of work, right when you are already emotionally drained.

What’s it like to be in couples counseling with me?

As a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, not only am I highly trained to provide couples therapy, I just really love doing it. There’s nothing more satisfying than guiding people who are hurting and uncertain to a sense of security and optimism in their relationship. My training and natural affinity for couples work make it possible for me to see and empathize with many sides of a problem, slow down the emotional turmoil, and hone in on the heart of the matter in a caring and thoughtful way.

Clients who have worked with me in the past say that even though they may find it hard to agree on anything, they can agree that I’m on both their sides at the exact same time. 

  • I create a structure that will make you feel comfortable. I’m not the kind of counselor that walks into a session and sits there quietly, waiting to see what happens. You will be able to tell that I am thinking about your case between sessions, developing a game plan for each session and the big picture of your treatment.

  • In our first session, I will ask you questions to help me understand what makes you and your situation unique, and how you got to where you are today. Together, we will create a plan for what you want to get out of counseling and how we’ll get there. 

  • For couples, I always have one-on-one sessions with each partner. I want to understand how you developed your particular style of conflict and connection, and how that’s playing off of your partner’s style.

  • I will challenge you to think, feel, and do new ways of being in your relationship. I help you uncover what’s really going on beneath your anger and/or avoidance, and I help you understand yourself and your partner in a new way. I will ask you, in session, to practice new communication skills with your partner. Like a coach, I will point out what you’re doing that’s both helping and harming your relationship.

  • Throughout the therapy process, I will regularly check in to make sure you’re reaching your goals and that your point of view is being heard. I know counseling is a huge investment of your time, money, and emotional energy. I want to make sure you’re getting what you need out of the experience.

Couples counseling will change the way you see your problems, yourself, and your partner. I’ll be there to guide you through the new territory in your relationship.

If you want to learn more about me and see if I’m a good fit for you, click below to book a free 15-minute consultation. I’d love to chat.


Education

 

Advanced Training in Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy

  • Externship, Core Skills, and Supervision Completed

University of Connecticut, Storrs, CT

  • Master of Arts in Marriage and Family Therapy

  • PhD in Human Development and Family Studies

University of Chicago

  • Master of Arts in the Social Sciences - Psychology

 

Credentials

 

Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, LMFT

  • Rhode Island (#00201)

  • Connecticut (#27.001997)

 

Alright, enough about me! I want to learn about you and what changes you want to see in your life. Click below to schedule a phone or video consultation with me.